Dear heavenly fire,
Take my tongue and pull it out, ash it and pray over its remains. Make it a dog and attempt to be a friend. My thoughts create a personality for me. I am an advocate and therefore I use my blanks. The pages past hundreds. But what is this poison I have spewed?
Life is not worth blaming. Truly humbled, from inside to the colonisation of my ego. I am penitent, and learning hardly about difficult laughter.
I went to see her within the hour she called. The best of my friends, undeclared in my chats. She sowed and I ripped, in the knowledge of her world. Taught and dressed, black crop and the owl. A night to ever recall. Pineapple vodka and touches hidden on the inside of plans. I did love her. When she died it remained. But the teacher says I should smile because it happened.
Difficulty breathing, laughing, loving, missing. I am choking father. I need to feel like I have one that listens.
My angel is poor. Low on special occasions. Birthdays are sour and time a miracle. She smiles to inform me the expenses for air and water outweigh her worth. Laughing through Steel she prays for what to eat.
Yet I yearn for green sees and turquoise drinks. I become the one to pass the law. One more task before I return into patience. To rewire my mind as a lover. I try to fall for honesty, and the handsome gaze of a man that does not judge. A brethren that upholds the only narrative. I dream of agape and then when I wake I get a taste.
Today I paint my room ocean blue. Wrap my bed with coverings of good things to come. If my cup fills I will pour it out into the void of those with empty hearts. The power is here, hiding in the bottom barrel of humanity. This pain was never to be worshiped and the man did love me. Living to die like all men that breathe.
Between actions pure and eyes kind, luck dances in a small corner of a room. Even when the rest is controlled, a tiny portion revolts and fights to find legs on the mighty will.
The picture was by my lovely friend Miti👇🏿